Posts belonging to Category Infidelity

The Pain of Remaining the Same

One of my favorite quotes is from Anais Nin.  It’s about pain and the beauty held within it.   “And the day came when the risk to remain tight in a bud was more painful than the risk it took to blossom.” You might be saying to yourself, “What? Beauty in pain? Have you lost […]

Family Law Should Not Be Treated the Same as Other Areas of Law

The laws relating to division of property and support and all other laws pertaining to families vary from state to state. Moreover, the laws change over time. One day the laws go one direction and the next day they could change. In other words, the laws are “arbitrary.” What makes California’s laws on these issues […]

Family Lawyer had an affair with client and billed her for it

Minnesota family lawyer suspended for 15 months On January 10, this year, family lawyer Thomas Lowe had his license to practice revoked for 15 months by the Minnesota Supreme Court. He had an affair with his client and even billed her for it. When his wife found out, he ended the personal and professional relationship. Did Minnesota […]

Why Clients Should Take Some Responsibility for Their Dissatisfaction with the Ultimate Outcomes of their Cases

Maybe clients would be more satisfied with the outcomes of their cases if they changed the way in which they interviewed and selected the attorneys they retain. When clients consult with attorneys, they frequently ask the attorneys questions of law – they want to know what the law is on a particular issue. Shouldn’t any […]

Surviving Separation

New to blogging here — but I’d like to share an edited excerpt from my book Surviving Separation and Divorce: A Woman’s Guide to Regaining Control, Building Strength & Confidence and Securing a Financial Future (second edition) by Loriann Oberlin, MS While written for women long before I began second career in mental health, I […]


Here is a link to an article describing a successful suit by a French wife against her ex-husband for failure to perform sexually during the marriage.  She was awarded the equivalent of $15,000 US. At first blush, this action seems preposterous. However, a look at law in Mississippi provokes some thought as to whether or […]

Why are we so mad at Arnold?

Are we mad because he had a child with another women or because he hid the child or because he cheated on America’s royal sweetheart? Or all the above? A bit confusing really since we know that infidelity happens all the time and is responsible for many marriage breakups. And let’s face it  – where […]

Taking the high road – Bronfman’s divorce party; Arnold Schwarzwenegger and Maria Shriver’s separation

A common complaint spouses have over their divorce is about lack of control. Indeed, divorce has its own procedures, protocols, customs and laws – and many of them a total mystery to the average person until they come face-to-face with the reality of divorce. It’s common to hear people say things like “I can’t believe […]

What went wrong?

The downward spiral in relationships often starts with the loss of respect for the husband, and the woman taking on a more masculine role. Whether this happened to you or not, it’s a good thing to be aware of.

How and Why to Try Reconciliation

As a divorce lawyer over the last 33 years, I have been frequently confronted with clients who wish to reconcile, even when a spouse has been guilty of considerable marital fault.  Reconciling carries with it legal considerations–particularly in fault states–which must be considered with a lawyer.  However, once the decision is made to pursue reconciliation, […]