Mediation and Divorce

“Boy, they could really use an attorney,” the woman at the cocktail party just recently told one of us, “but they firmly insist on doing it themselves. It’s simply a mess!”.

It isn’t really hard to understand why, in the face an unknown and confusing divorce process, they would pick not to see a lawyer. Attorneys are simply perceived as too expensive– and possibly dangerous– to an already traumatic and sad scenario. To the lady at the mixer, we suggested mediation.

Using an attorney as a mediating problem-solver rather of a problem-maker can ease the procedure for a divorcing couple, cutting stress and prices. Couples must bear in mind that separation is a legal process– one they have to go through in order to end their marital relationship or their registered domestic partnership. The separation procedure was not made to be easy on the parties; it was made to be navigated by lawyers. Dissolution of a marriage or registered domestic partnership is litigation and, all too often, it is simply too inefficient, too expensive and too exhausting on one’s soul. In these cases, mediation is an excellent option.

An effective mediation will prevent a drawn-out fight and guarantee neither party sees the inside of a courtroom. A qualified mediator can assist parties understand the process, ensuring that both continue to be an essential part of process which neither party is sidelined. He or she can keep the process directed towards resolution, hence guaranteeing efficiency and keeping down prices. In turn, parties gain higher control over the process, less constrained by procedure and exactly what a court may choose.

The mediation process is private and, with little exception under California law, just what is said and done a mediation cannot be made use of in court against either client.

The result of an effective separation mediation will be an agreement between the parties regarding exactly how the separation will be resolved; for instance, exactly how the home will be divided or exactly how custody of children will be arranged. Mediation is a considerably more efficient choice than bringing litigation. This means a substantial expense savings, and a significant decrease in stress.